Home Alone: The Mayhem Begins

The Mayhem

Yes, finally after years of hoping, praying and wishing I finally have the house to myself. Not for long though, my parents will be back in two weeks but I ain’t crying, two weeks is enough for me.

You might think my parents must be crazy to leave a child as insane as me home alone, but it is through no fault of their own. They did try to hire a babysitter.

Goth BabysitterIt didn’t work out so well and they thought I’m better of alone.

They say that human mind is best satisfied when it does something it is not allowed to do and so I did. I have always wanted to cook, put together all the tasty stuff and whip up an extremely delicate yet tasty dish. And since this was my first time in the kitchen I decided to work on something less intricate. I decided I’d make a simple smoothie. So I put in all my favorite food items and mixed and whipped to make the greatest smoothie ever known to man.
The smoothie turned out to be a flop. Lesson learnt: No matter how good meat tastes, do not put it in a smoothie.

Oh! well that was a sad ending to what could have otherwise beenΒ MasterChef – esque glory.
Later it so happened I left the hot water tap running in the bathroom and had forgotten all about it. Usually Mother would have noticed and turned it off but today it just kept running till the house was shrouded in a misty gloss. The neighbor seeing this thought the house was on fire and immediately dialed 911. A fire truck appeared around the corner within half an hour. By which I had realized the running water and turned off the tap. So no more smoke = neighbor in trouble.
My neighbor was in shock when she was booked with a hefty fine for causing alarm and wasting valuable emergency resources.

She was later at my door demanding an apology for what was seriously not my mistake to which my reply was, ” What begins with an F ends with a K and costs your neighbor? That’s right, A Firetruck.”
“Your going to have to pay for this you little twat, this is the last of your silly tricks.” She said as she stormed off.

I didn’t take her words seriously till later when….. (To be continued)

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37 thoughts on “Home Alone: The Mayhem Begins

    • I must have used the wrong meat nonetheless such incompetent behavior cannot be accepted from one so articulate as me πŸ˜›

      I really need to take cooking lessons.

  1. Sounds like a ‘me’ moment! LoL!!!

    A meat smoothie is a protein shake, which I hate!!! LoL!!!

    I don’t usually get so many emails, but a few friends who stopped posting are back and there was Miss Demure Restraint who got Freshly Pressed and added a bunch of new folks – it’s all good fun! πŸ™‚

    Remember: When going back to church after a long abscence remember to wear a stake proof vest and admit to a taste for Garlic… LoL! πŸ™‚

    God Bless and Merry Christmas!


    • A protein shake? Had I known better I’d have never used meat.

      You know there is an option to unsubscribe to those emails. I used to get them a lot when I was new here, but since then I’ve made great friends with the unsubscribe button to those comment emails.

  2. Hmmmm…………. I’ve been left speechless by the thought of you being at home alone for two weeks! I….I…..I…. Oh, forgot about it. Just keep us updated.

  3. Oh I just love this story.. I don’t think it was your fault though. You just didn’t know. so she can’t get mad at you when she obviously tried to look out for you but got mad at the fine lol.

      • She was such a sweet heart but don’t know why my parents cancelled at the last moment, maybe because of the extra piercing on the ear… so not cool.

  4. Pingback: Home Alone: The Mayhem Continues | The Embarrassment

  5. Meat in smoothie….? Cool but I don’t think I could eat one. May be egg yolk or something. It was fun though right? The F and K was a surprise. As your neighbor, man she’s on fire , huh? She stormed out with smokes….

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